Word of the Year (2021)

Well, last year (2020), I did not choose a word for the year. I can see the results of not having a focus. It led to chaos. During the last year, I do not feel like I advanced in my personal growth. I feel like I just waded through the year with no purpose. There was a vibration of survival that defined the year, not just for myself but for the collective, given the pandemic, social unrest, fires, an intense presidential election and other events of the year. All these things affected me personally, on a mirco level. I’ve come out at the end of the year fairly well, considering. Better off than alot, that’s for sure. Still I have some serious issues to address now that a new year, new energy has emerged. So I am dedicating 2021 to myself.

I’ve decided that Thinner is going to be my word. I am inspired by the novel by Stephen King. This word can apply to several areas of my life that I would like to decrease. Starting with my weight. I have some health issues that I want to overcome and reducing my weight will greatly help those issues and they may even go away. I also want to thin my belongings, so a purge of stuff is in my future. Spring cleaning? I want to thin my spending. (And perhaps try selling some of my items). So, that’s where I stand right now. Thinner.

Bring it on!

Happy 2021!

Change in Perspective

I'm coming up on my third year back to mainstream work and 18 months back to 40 hours a week.  Today I was noticing my reaction to my new utility bill....

I used to get my bills and get stressed out about them.  I'd feel resentful about paying the bills.  I'd feel anxiety about paying the bill.  I'd often seek distractions to keep from thinking about my bills and I'd also spend tons of time obsessing over my payback schedule.  In short, I was fearful and resentful of my bills. 

Today I got my new electric bill.  It's at its highest at this time of year when I'm trying to heat a drafty apartment.  And I run cold.  So it's high.  In the past I would have definitely stressed about the amount while being angry about having to pay it.  But today, I felt gratitude that I have the money to pay it.  I'm grateful I have a roof over my head and I'm grateful I am warm inside. 

I realize I am living a blessed life. Things aren't perfect, but I choose to be grateful for everything I have.

New Year New Schmear

Whatever goals I thought I was going to start my new year with have quickly flown the coop.  Those ways are for the good old days.  I am now taking a more balanced and grounded approach.  Realistic even...

How did I think I could take on so many new changes all at once?  I ended up failing at every one of them before the day ended. 

Why are we, why am I, so hard on myself (ourselves).  It's something I see all around me via friends, social media and culturely, even when I changed my yearly goal to one word I had a secret list of life changes I was applying to myself.  Pure folly.

So in this moment I give up my notions of perfection and ease into comfort&joy and work towards that goal and away from tasks that are not in alignment with that ultimate goal.

Feel good. 😍

2019 - Comfort&Joy

As I was going through my emails yesterday, I came across one that suggested choosing A WORD as your new year symbol/intention for what you wanted instead of having resolutions.  Well, I'm ahead of the game as that is exactly what I have been doing for several years now! 

2018 was the year of Ease and it went quite well!  Even my breakup with my significant other went with relative ease considering.  So, for me, this method has worked incredibly well!

I am choosing a combo of words for 2019...Comfort&Joy!  I need these in my life at this time.  After coming in to some ease, I noted that I'm missing some comfort and joy.  I am looking forward to bringing these elements into my world this year.

I also want to move closer in (toward downtown) so I'm closer to my social circles again and less likely to isolate due to vicinity.  That will take some time as I'm on a lease and I also need to save up for the deposit and moving costs.  But it's a worthy goal. 

I will continue working on improving the range of motion in my left shoulder.  I resolved the frozen shoulder on my right side and have no doubt I can repeat the success on my left side given time and patience.  It is taking much longer to resolve but with consistent stretching and exercises I, at least, am not seeing it get worse.

I continue to pursue my health by giving up all meat and dairy products.  This has turned into a pleasure for me.  I love the benefits my body has gained by giving up these foods.  I no longer crave meat and dairy foods.  I feel better and have had positive lab results that only validate my choices.  I look forward to seeing what improvements come from removing all dairy from my diet this coming year.

I do have a goal of getting back to writing this year.  I miss my muse and I have gotten off track as I let other activities become a priority.  Also, my daughter bought me a beginner's guitar for Christmas so that is another aspiration of mine, to learn how to play it!  I have lots to keep me intrigued in the new year!