Asking and Receiving with Grace and Style - Amanda Palmer "The Art of Asking"

The Art of Asking


This artist is very inspiring - enjoy!

Asking for Help - Part 3

I still haven't had any brilliant insights/solutions - for myself - around the subject of economical resources, ie. how to fund my life.

I put a donate button on my blog with the vague notion of following in the footsteps of some amazing bloggers and try to eek out a living from my writing.  I mean, eventually.  Perhaps.

However, as soon as I put up that donate button and began to view my writing as some kind of fiscal resource for myself, I lost motivation to write.  I think that's interesting.  This also applies to jobs I've had, and businesses I've tried to launch myself.  As soon as the dollar bill becomes part of the equation, the motivation to DO leaves the building.


I continue to read my favorite blogs and even though these two blog writers are requesting funds and do so without any outward appearances of awkwardness, I still sense a justification of value.  I could be wrong.  I'm sure the readers appreciate hearing what is going on, but I thought the point of knowing our own value is not to justify it but to own it.  (no judgment - I am observing and learning)



http://sitsshow.blogspot.com/2014/01/the-moroccan-adventure-of-stillness-in.html
http://americankabuki.blogspot.com/2014/02/morocco-diary-4.html

I definitely carry around a creepy feeling inside me that tells me I'm not worth anything unless I am producing something of value which is reflected in monetary funds.  

I like D's post here about value:

http://removingtheshackles.blogspot.com/2014/02/the-new-media-exchanging-value.html
http://removingtheshackles.blogspot.com/2014/02/the-new-media-exchanging-value-update.html

This ain't over yet....

Asking for Help...Part 2

http://goldenageofgaia.com/2014/01/on-the-struggle-for-mastery-and-radical-trust/

And another blogger – going through the same thing…requesting help.

The struggle feels familiar.  

We have become really good at giving and serving and doing. We need to be willing to receive.

For some of us, asking for help and receiving is awkward.  

Is there a false sense of power when I'm the giver?  And when I refuse to receive am I subconsciously saying "I don't need you"? 

Funny that this blog post connects asking for help with trust - my word for the year.  

A Request For Help

A request for help.

A blogger I follow at http://removingtheshackles.blogspot.com/ has inspired me with her own empowerment.

The woman has asked for help.  

I empathize with her reluctance.  

The awkwardness is uncomfortable.

I sit with it for me.

I do not understand why asking for help makes me feel *blech*.  Ego, pride, fear of rejection, fear of judgment, unworthiness, guilt and shame come to mind.  I’m sure there is much below this and I know I am NOT the only person who feels like this.  At least ONE other person out there shares this with me and she has a blog! 

As I begin this year, I am re-entering the work force.  I have been through an amazing year (2013) in which I chose to embrace the opportunity to do inner work.  I was not employed and what money I did receive via student financial aid and my tax return I contributed to my friends who have lovingly provided a shelter for me, my daughter and my cat.  I contributed some to my daughter and her care.  I contributed money to further my education.  I also paid some debt, allowed my car to be repossessed and my financial aid to be revoked.  I also contributed and donated to others in need.  I indulged sparingly.  

That is the honest assessment of the situation on a practical level.

Looking back in retrospect I am pleased with where I am.  I learned to live with others, to communicate more effectively, to be more flexible and less controlling; I rebuilt relationships with my daughter, my sister and my mother.  I discovered new skills within myself and I found love in my heart.  Some would go so far as to call that God.  

And yet, that doesn't seem to warrant worthiness.  At least in a world where we have required ourselves to PAY for everything.  Like a warm shelter, clean water and fresh food.  So, because I didn't make a ton of money, publish a scholarly journal, earn a degree or produce in some other manner I have the perception that to "the public" I loafed all year.  *sigh*

Further....this perception I have is just that.  MY perception.  No one has judged me.  I judge myself and then project that judgment onto others and it is reflected back to me and back and forth and back and forth.

This year my goal is to create a balanced foundation in which I integrate the practical with the so called non practical.  Balance for my wellbeing.  Not overwork, not over ambition, not over indulgence, not over austerity, not over independence, not over dependence, not over focus on inner work, not over focus on material security…a loving combination of everything synching and merging and dancing together.  Bringing the Divine into the mundane.

Now that I have justified my worth.  Whew.  

Baby steps.

To Be Continued.....  *cue dramatic music*