Cold Springs / Camp Sherman

Cold Springs / Camp Sherman
Winter Soltice 2013

Thursday, October 22, 2015

The Lion Roars

I thought, by now, that I was immune to all the so called negative crapola "out there".  Oh Miss High and Mighty that I am.  Buahahahahahahaha!  Boy did I fall smack on my face quickly!  I love Karma.  I truly do.  I have Saturn conjunct my Sun and it (Karma) never fails to instantly manifest.  I get instant Karma just as soon as I get a eensy bit cocky with meself!  And since Mars is right on the other side of my Sun, I get Saturn and Mars (in Aries, no less) straddling me, er jockeying for position, each one rising and slapping the other for control.  Yah, my life is a bowl of cherries.  Mmmmmm!

So, the energy, with the heat of the sun, is rising.  Not to be left behind is my ego, jutting out like a strutting peacock, screaming for attention like a 2 year old child.  My pride doesn't often bare itself so blatantly, but when it does it puts on a show like Liberace, Elton John and Lady Gaga combined.  Only Ghettofied.  I did the deed.  Lucky for me, Instant Karma appeared and just I showed my posterior it was also generously handed right back to me in the form of public humiliation.  In the heat of the moment I have no problem acting a fool, but regret does creep in like a ninja and the scene of my folly replays itself over and over in my mind like a blooper reel. 

I had an astrological reading done one time and I have one aspect in my chart that carries with it the characteristics of a "disobedient spirit"..."habitual and chronic irritability and rebelliousness".  Oh my...sigh....   This plagues me.  I also am very tender hearted and sensitive.  This creates within me cognitive dissonance.  It is like I am at war within myself.  I have a volatile and vile temper and yet I am extremely compassionate, sensitive and empathetic.  What the hayhobalina? 

Thank the gods for Instant Karma!  I warn those close to me to "not poke the bear" in me.  I can be the most generous and loving person you ever met and the most ferocious.  It has been a life long journey for me to integrate my personality and to accept myself the way that I am and to feed the loving side of me and to acknowledge my ferocity but not let it overtake me.  Still learning.  Always learning.  That is the joy of this life.