My Mystical Life

Growing up I lived in two very extreme and opposite worlds.  It gives a whole new meaning to the term bi-polar!

My parents divorced when I was about 4 years old and both remarried within the same year.  Until I was 10 years old I lived in both worlds as I traveled back and forth between my mother and my father's homes.

My father's household became a place of fear and pain, enforced with strict and zealous religious fervor.  Sometimes the control that was placed over me felt suffocating and binding.

My mother's home was a sanctuary for me.  Not perfect, but my mother allowed me freedom of thought.  She introduced to me to esoterica, mysticism, psychology and consciousness at a very young age.  She taught me about Astrology and Tarot and told me about Carlos Castenada and Jane Roberts.  I eavesdropped on quiet conversations she had with friends and family about conspiracy theories.

Though I was exposed to non-conventional ideas, my mother is also a diehard skeptic and embedded in me doubt and disbelief.  She has a scientific mind.  She comes from Missouri, the "show me" state.

So, I came away with a lack of trust in traditional religion and a lack of belief in anything intangible.

It has been up to me to delve into any and all belief systems and redefine them for myself.  To come out of the metaphysical closet and determine for myself what I want to believe and how I want to live. 

Needless to say, I found my heart's desire in the mysteries.  They are like treasures for me.  I open them up, explore ideas and find home.

I don't think its a coincidence that I was born on the same day as Manly P. Hall and Edgar Cayce.

I have studied and explored every idea that I could.  From Christianity to Wicca, from Buddism to Kabbalah. I continue searching for new and exciting ideas and it has become more of a hobby than anything else as I find my spirituality very unique to me and also private and sacred.

For me, these mysteries and belief systems are tools to raise my awareness, to broaden my perspective and to temper my fiery spirit.  

What I have come away with...and this is solely my own personal perspective and path...

They all relate.  They are all connected.  They all lead the way home.